uuuurgh
just had one of the worst things i've ever tasted - salty licorice. It's a Dutch candy, looks innocuously like a gummy sweet, but tastes like...er...a sweaty foot or something. I was shoving handfuls of wasabi peas into my mouth just to get the licorice down. Apparently it's made with similar compounds to what urea has......eeek!

Sunday already?
Back in a familiar life surrounded by dear relatives and old friends, and the US one quickly fades into the background. But the blogs, the emails and the news reports serve as a reminder that life, whether I am present or not, continues to move at the same unrelenting pace. New friendships are forged, old ones strengthed, new places are explored, old haunts revisited. Whether i am in Singapore or in California, time, people, life, goes on. And when i return to one place from the other, i am frustrated by all that i have missed out on. 7 Months. The sudden deepening of my cousin's voice came as a shock. My aunt's swelling tummy, a surprise, since she showed no signs of pregnancy the last time i left. My other aunt's broken foot - no one told me. Friends, with new boyfriends/girlfriends, entering the workforce for the first time. Not large significant changes, but little subtle ones that make me feel displaced and ever so detached....unable to put down my roots in any one place.

The Move (part 2)
Met my new neighbour-to-be last night. Twas a good meeting, which left me really looking forward to the move-in once i get back from Singapore in 2 weeks. Okay, so his dog started barking his head off once approached the main house, which was not very nice at all. But once Maddy(the dog) and I said hi, things started to take off. She sat quietly on my left foot, mm..which was the first time i had my foot sat on actually, and err..just let me stroke her. Those clever animals sure know how to make us fuss over them. Then she even fetched her rubber ball over so that i would play fetch. You must understand that i have never really played fetch with a dog before; i used to have a little pom that only wanted to eat or sit under the couch, so this was another first time for me. Kinda surreal throwing a bright pink thing out of the door, and have a big black furry thing bound out of the house in pursuit, and then repeat this three times. It's funny how excited Maddy gets, whether it's the first time i throw it or the millionth. I'm gonna have fun as long as she doesn't poop all over. =) The guy was pretty nice too. He seems really cool with sharing the internet and the phone and washer/dryer, which makes me feel glad coz i know i'll be able to pop over should i need any help. And he also doesn't seem psychotic or deranged in any way, but i have my pepper spray at hand *muahaha*....kindly given to me by ys for my protection. Oh, and a good omen....we saw a bright shooting star above us as we stood outside discussing the finer details of i-can't-remember-what. Everything is falling in place now...i'm happy to say that this post-graduation life is suiting me well. =)
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Best wishes to all my dear friends that have started school. It's weird hearing you talk about classes and the campus and stuff, while being so strangely detached from it all. Have fun learning new stuff, while i start purging facts/formulas/useful skills from my little brain.

and now for the news
Mm..someone commented that my blog kinda looks like a newspaper now. well, i would hope not, partly because i know that the news here would be hardly worthy of mention even in the tabloids, and partly because i put in some effort into finding pretty fonts (which other people cannot see..boohoo). Yah, i almost forgot to mention that i revamped the page....really needed a change. so now it's blue =) and gives me much more space in the main frame to write/put pictures/etc... I still need to add the links and other random things. I've been so busy with work though, that time just flies right by. I suppose it'll take a while before more changes are made to this page. But that's alwez been the case right?
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I'm leaving for Singapore tomorrow night...can hardly believe it. Have had a ton of work in the past few weeks, and I think my supervisor and I will welcome a short break. The project i'm working on is really fascinating, and strange as it may sound, i'm gonna miss working in the lab. I've never felt that way before about labs. Oh dear, i'm turning into a lab rat! We've been really lucky with our experiments so far...most things have worked out, and so much has been done in just 1 1/2 months. With a lot more luck, we could be on our way to developing a drug for auto-immune diseases. It'll be real nice if the work that i put in now could help thousands of people around the world. I think this is one reason why research in a pharmaceutical company gets me that much more excited. okay, the pay helps too. =)

ssshh....it's meant to be a secret...
...but i'm flying back to Singapore!! =) My supervisors have kindly agreed to let me go back to singapore for a short break. More details about how that came about later. =P Now i'm so happy i can't stop grinning and tell anyone who wants to hear. My parents will be back in Singapore the weekend i arrive, the five of us will once again all be home at the same time, plusplusplus Daryl is currently back from Deutschland on holiday! *xiao jumps around the room in glee* Yes, this will take my mind off my twin bruised toenails for the time being. Sambal stingray, char kway teow, chwee kueh, roti prata..here i come! *drool* Although just two short weeks, this trip is a dream come true.
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My colleague and i have been surfing the net for random rubbishy sites. Extremely therapeutic after a long day at work. Would you wear this? Great, a Pulitzer Prize winner specializing in toilet humor-Dave Barry.

The Move
This is perhaps the biggest and most significant event in my life in the past few months. Yep, I moved. Into an apartment in Mountain View, which i had never been to before. An apartment that i had never seen. With roommates that i'd never met. And with absolutely no idea what to expect. Save for the roach problem, everything has worked out really well thus far. WHAT ROACH PROBLEM?! you may ask. Mm...my roommate and I are now very coolly nonchalant about the irritating pests that plagued us upon our move in. We didn't even cook for 2-3 weeks because of these unwelcome kitchen guests. Well, I can now bite the heads off cockroaches with my bare teeth. Nah, not so powerful yet lah. Luckily they're the small German cockroach and not the huge-ass singapore flying ones. We've tried fumigating, roach bait, roach killing powder and insecticide...and ironically the problem got better once we started cooking. MMm...my cooking ain't that bad right?
Anyhow, living in this apartment has been pretty safe, and it has nice amenities such as a pool and a playground. It's been fun living with my new housemate, Emiley, who i believe has a Singapore obsession, apparently triggered by a fascination with our very own SDU. She knows so much about the country, and loves the food. We've even made plans for makan at Banana Leaf tomorrow night! Yar..and she even tried to make me record the answering machine message in a strong singaporean accent, just to amuse her and her friends. harhar.
It's also been fun furnishing my room from scratch. Cheapskate lil' me plowed though Craigslist everyday, and now i have a cosy little room with a glorious queen sized mattress and twin futon amongst other things....all for less than $50. Just put up pictures of ABC, my parents, the canoeists, and so on...they add warmth to a boring room.
If i could choose, i would stay in a furnished studio. (Yes, and become even more antisocial) At the end of a long day at work, i just want to have my own private space, without having to be cordial and constantly worrying if i'd be stepping on someone else's toes all the time.
One thing i hate about the whole moving process though, is meeting up with prospective co-tenants or roommates. With every person i meet, i try to be really friendly and open, so that they get a good idea of who i am and where i come from. Also, on their side, they have to open up their homes, and provide a glimpse of what life for them is like. It hate it especially since i feel much of it is just superficial courtesy rather than real i-like-you-so-muchnesss. There was this little old lady whose room i went to see. The house was okay, the room was okay, but she was nice, eager and sincere. I felt so terrible turning her down, coz she actually was so honest and open to discussing all the terms of rental since she had a good feeling about me. I felt bad for a few days after that.....but i really wanted to stay in a studio by myself. Later i met another old lady that made me feel very unhappy. She had a great studio, a cute doggie, and well, seemed friendly enough. We talked for quite a while, and i would have probably gotten the place if not for what happened next. I mentioned that i had to wait for a phone call from another renter before i could give her my answer....that was an earlier arrangement that i had made. This old lady suddenly became someone else. She folded away my application, stood up, picked up the dog, turned off the light and abruptly ended our meeting. She could not even spare a smile from that point on. I was disappointed at the way things turned out. I don't understand how people can be so hypocritical. Oh well, at least i got to know what my prospective landlord would be like before i learnt the hard way. No more old ladies for me from then on.
i'm dead serious.

Japan in June
The bulk of the photographs i took in Japan were not of people, but often some sort of weirdly interesting food or gadget. I can understand why Japan would be a culture shock to many people. People behave so very different than those in other large cities. I was pleasantly surprised that strong emphasis on courtesy and decorum still made up a large part of the japanese culture. The hotel staff were all extremely enthusiastic about well, everything! Whether I asked the front desk staff for the nearest optician, hair salon or commercial belt, they would immediately dig through the yellow pages and folders filled with newspaper clippings and meticulously written telephone numbers and addresses. Then they would even ring up these shops, just to make sure if they really were what i was looking for. It was almost like a mission. It amazes me that this is even with a "no tipping" rule. Yes, a no-tipping rule. Even porters! In Japan, the group is still valued above the individual. Try doing that in the US. Oh, and there's the polite bowing. By the end of the trip, i was unconsciously bobbing my head up and down whenever i spoke to the Japanese, just as they tirelessly do. Here's a couple of things that made the trip a memorable one:

1. The toilets - oh man, i spent so much time exploring the various functions of Japanese toilet bowls. Here's a pic of some of the features you can expect from a typical loo.

I think the flushing sound thing is the funniest thing. The instructions claimed that the flushing sound (it sounds really fake by the way) was a water-saving feature. Who would use it? I can't imagine that anyone would use this feature. Flush after every few pees just to save water?! yucks.

2. The juxtaposition of old and new- Traditional shrines and buddhist temples coexist side by side with the modern metropolis skyscrapers and apartments. You can almost imagine samurai-like gentlemen walking the streets of Tokyo. Afterall, as late as the 20th century, the Japanese were still carrying swords and wore traditional garb, thanks to their isolation policy.

3. The meticulous detail that goes into the aesthetic presentation of japanese food and gifts- I was lucky to have enjoyed a real japanese (8-course?) dinner at a traditional ryokan inn. I just had to take pictures of every dish i ate. It was like eating art itself! Even a simple hotel breakfast turned out to be a fit-for-photo-taking affair. Mm....It was really interesting...half the time i didn't even know what i was eating! Gifts were also always very presented, whether it was a can of tea or a bag of sweets. (okay, as u can see i spent alot of time eating and buying food)


4. Having my first public bath experience. i.e. first time completely naked in front of perfect strangers and my mom. Very er..steamy. Hm...okay..have to stop thinking about it. It's one of those things that you just do but not think about too much. I tried taking a picture of naked guys in a bath waaaaaay far away in another building. SHHhhh...don't tell anyone! Anyway it was too far away. But there was nothing to hide the fact that there were naked men in a public bath. No screens or curtains, just glass from ceiling to floor. Alright...once again too many details here. =P

5. Quirky sights all around Japan - Despite the government closure of a street where people would go to busk, see and be seen, the famous youngsters of Harajuku still sit near the subway station on Sundays, seemingly oblivious to tourists snapping away at them. But i think they dress up as such for a purpose, and are actually happy to oblige to a picture request. The english standard in Japan is also not up to par with many other major cosmopolitan cities, so you do get some really funny signs. Wording on clothes especially, don't make any sense at all.


6. Finally, I had an awesome time with my parents. Sure, there were the occasional squabbles and times where i felt they were overly protective. But i know they are just concerned, and will always be whether i'm 6, 16, or 60. I felt like we got to know each other better, and spend some quality time together exploring a strange city. My mom asked me questions about daryl, and my dad said some really nice things to me. And i can feel that they are trying their best to let go, and treat me as more of an individual. Going overseas has made me appreciate my parents more, although i very seldom express it to them. This trip to Japan brought us closer emotionally, and moved me in a special way. I can only hope that my thank you card at the end of the trip adequately expressed my gratitude towards all they have done for me all these years.

ps. You just have to check out this photoblog has awesome snapshots of daily life in the Tokyo area from the eyes (or lens rather) of a pretty cool Canadian dude living there with his wife and very cute baby boy.

Where the hell has all that time gone?!
well, my mundane life has simply been jam-packed with a ton things ever since graduation. Where and how should i start posting again? I've been considering pulling the plug on this oft neglected blog...especially after comparing it to all the beautiful stylo webpages that everyone else seems to have. Boo! I wish mine were chio too. Although my blog fails to serve any aesthetic purpose, it is the one window that friends miles away have to my little life. Especially because i'm becoming so damn antisocial.
Seriously, i can hardly recall going out in a group larger than three in the past month or so. I build walls, i keep to myself, i don't well, socialize. I hate being so closed off to people. but at the same time, I like being alone. I like knowing that i can do any damn thing i wish, whether it's digging my nose or making stupid faces, not that i actually do such things. ;)
Guess i'll start blogging bits and pieces of the past few months.....little fragments of the wonderful summer that i have had. Post-graduation life had always looked so unsettlingly uncertain, but thanks to a few great people and lucky twists of fate, it's worked out just great. Many thanks to whoever is out there looking out for me...

fire in the sky
Living near Moeser Lane made it possible to catch yesterday's spectacular fireworks across the bay, even though it took 5 minutes of muffled 'booms' to make lazy ol' me leave the house. The annual KFOG KaBoom was one of the longest displays i have ever seen. Forget about the waaaaaaay short Singapore National Day fireworks. This one must have been close to 15 minutes! Just imagine the money they spent. I didn't take pictures though...just grabbed my car keys and raced up the hill. After the fireworks, there was a grand line of cars chugging down Moeser Lane. Somehow i thought it was pretty funny.
i miss him the most not when i'm upset, or having a bad day. It's when i'm really happy, or see something nice that i feel the great distance between us. I'm looking forward to the day where we can actually live our lives together, and the emptiness will be a thing of the past.

Here, there and everywhere
Mike the headless chicken sure helped lift my spirits tonight! I'm serious, check it out. It's even on the Online New Paper! *chuckle*
Justin.Org occupied me for quite a while last night. Google describes it as "screens full of Justin, links that intertwine all over. One of the pioneers of the Online Journal." Well, the main page itself is not that interesting, but click on the tons of links to various other Justin pages and you'll discover lots of interesting snippets. Here, there, everywhere.
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Finally went to Tang Center to check out the cough that has been plaguing me for the past 2 weeks. Came home with 2 different asthma inhalers. So scary hor? Turns out that my breathing volume is only ~355 when it should be about 465. No wonder i get out so of breath walking up that hill to North Gate. Yep, now i can blame it all on my inflamed lungs. Of course it has nothing to do with me being terribly unfit from lack of exercise. So i'm officially taking steroids...hope i don't start growing hair in weird places! =)
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I'm super excited about my parents flying in for my graduation in 2 weeks. I miss them a whole lot...Can't wait to show them around this place that has been home to me for almost 3 years. Can't wait for them to see what an independant life i lead. Can't wait for them to share with them the beautiful sights of the bay area, and for them to see it through the eyes of a non-tourist. We have an exciting itinary lined up. Dinner at Chez Panisse? My lucky, lucky tastebuds =).. What's more, we're heading off to Japan for 10 days. Tokyo, Kyoto, Mt Fuji.. that'll be an awesome graduation treat! Arigato to my parents in advance =) Unfortunately, I can't speak Japanese save for a few basic (and useless) sentences. Watashiwa kawaii des! right.....

running out of room
My room is the champion of all messy rooms. I would take pictures of it to prove my point, but it's gotten so bad that i even feel paiseh leaving my door open. Somehow i just always have piles of books, clothes and plastic bags all over the floor. I need more shelving and cupboards, so that i can stuff whatever is on the floor inside and pretend that it's all nicely packed away, and that i'm in fact a good, clean and neat person. My parents are the neatest and most organized people i know, so why did i turn out this way? I want neat genes. Hopefully i can do something by the time they get here in 2 weeks, or else.......endless nagging! =)

Here's a picture of my old dorm room (see the potential already?):

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Weather outlook for tomorrow super blah. Weather.com shows this huge green mass (meaning rainclouds) moving up and into the Bay Area. I wish i would suddenly disappear into nothingness, but that's not how things work. And it's already May. So how about some endless California sunshine? Grrrr.... I hope the weather holds, and i get to go for the windsurfing class i signed up for through Cal Adventures. They have a certain adventureship program where for a measly 100 bucks, you get windsurfing, kayaking and sailing lessons...and free rentals! Yep...have to squeeze in as much as i can before i graduate. =) I've attended 2 days of the 4 day-sailing course, and it rocks! I can now sail a 2 man boat round the little cove at the Marina. Ok, not much of a skill to crow about...but the views of SF, the bay and the Golden Gate are just spectacular. Oh, and capsizing and righting the boat is SO MUCH FUN...even though the water was freaking cold. My partner and i just couldn't stop laughing and giggling while freezing our butts off. Water makes xiao so happy. This has to be one of the best things i've done here in Berkeley.

no strings attached
mood: super weather day!
Guess what? I'm sitting on my bed writing out this blog...isn't it cool? It's just perfect for someone as lazy as me. =) Yes, i splurged and bought myself a cordless keyboard and mouse. It was going at such a great price (only $35) such that i couldn't resist. Guess the digital camera will just have to wait a little longer. Wish i had a bigger computer scrreen though, coz it's rather hard to read the littler words..Argh..okay..now i have even less of an excuse to get out of my comfy bed....soon my poor leg muscles will waste away into oblivion, and i'll be a slob...but a cool, high tech, wired one, with incredibly strong fingers. .

summertime reunion
Happy coz i'll go to sleep tonight having just had a great conversation. Life stories, travel updates, latest gossip and weather trends were exchanged over much missed lighthearted bantering and laughter. =) Everytime i talk to her i'm reminded of the year we spent living together. Some days, especially the sunny days which make you feel like there's so much of the world to take in, i'm reminded of her more than ever. It's nice to have a friend to appreciate the littlest things in life with. Like feel all excited over a simple sandwich, or the blueness of the bay. Or the feeling of grass between one's toes, or finding a little ladybug. mm..I have a feeling we'll get to meet up here in Berkeley again. Just to let you know...I'm looking forward to that day, when we'll share our stories while soaking up sun on Memorial Glade! =)

ole ole...to good weather days
I'm spending yet another afternoon in lab. Indoors. Seriously, how many hours do scientist and researchers while away in the lab just waiting for for invisible molecules to interact with other different, but just as invisible, molecules? Stripping a membrane takes an hour, blocking it another hour. Incubating it with a primary antibody takes two hours, and secondary Ab yet another hour. And those are just waiting times. And so many times, after you invest what feels like half your life doing an experiment, one step goes horrendously wrong, and you say byebye to your results. It can be frustrating completing an experiment, much less duplicates of multiple experiments. We should all be thankful for those good natured, fluorescent-light-loving scientists who spend their days and nights running experiments and killing animals for the good of mankind. One example is the italian expert that sacrificed his life identifying the SARS virus currently going around the world. My parents have always dissuaded me from doing microbiology, in fear of such an outcome. well, no matter what field of biology i pursue, i really hope that it brings some good to the world. I didn't choose to do bioengineering because of the government, i chose it for myself. Although i didn't really know what i was getting into, at the end of 3 years, i'm real glad that i chose to take this path. Bioengineering allows me to do basic biological research, and yet apply it to solving everyday needs. Stuff i'm interested in now: tissue engineered cardiovascular or liver tissue. I'm excited about the coming year. Let's see where it takes me. =)
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On a different note, i spent lunchtime in a corner of La Val's at northside with 40 strangers, brought together by the live Real Madrid - Man Utd game. (i'm sure half of you will stop reading this entry from here on =P) Although not a fan of either team, I was just curious to see if the hype surrounding the game could live up to expectations. It was pretty awesome. Awesome Real Madrid scored awesome goals. But what was more interesting, was watching the other watchers. It's pretty rare to find so many people in a pizza joint, sitting in front of a huge TV, watching not baseball, not basketball, not american football, but real english football. There were some who came in, glanced at the TV, then sat facing away, focused only on lunch. Those were the americans. Then there were those who brought throngs of friends and added to the atmosphere. Those were Spanish. Also, there were British (my ex-math TA!) and Brazilian and Indians. Pretty cool huh? It was like the I-house had moved to northside. =) It's always fun watching soccer with people. The "ooohs" and "aaahs" really do make a difference. If only i had someone to watch soccer with...*sigh* too bad fellow liverpool fans are a tad far away!

if i could just...
it always hurts to say goodbye. the stabbing pain when we hug our last hug. the dull, empty achy feeling as he disappears around the corner. the tears. it never gets any easier. i know we're strong, and every day we spend together reaffirms that. but it's amazing how one person can change your life. Every day is a day to look forward to. and every day, no matter rain or shine, is one of the best days you've ever had. but well, life goes on. and i'm fine now. no more tears, no more sadness. just looking forward to the next time we meet, which is still somewhat uncertain. but mostly, looking back on the beautiful 2.5 weeks we shared together, i'm real glad. =)
welcome back mundane life! right, gotta start day one w/o him studying for midterms. *groan*

Vanessa Carlton - A Thousand Miles

Making my way down town
Walking fast
Faces pass
And I'm home bound

Staring blankly ahead
Just making my way
Making a way
Through the crowd

And I need you
And I miss you
And now I wonder ..

If I could fall
Into the sky
Do you think time
Would pass me by
Cause you know I'd walk a thousand miles
If I could just see you... tonight

high ho (to the tune of Heigh Ho)
High ho High ho
It's off in a plane we go
We fly so high, we touch the sky
High ho High ho High ho ...
Somehow this little tune that my sec 1 gep camp group invented has stayed with me all these years. Given, it is not a very difficult tune at all, but aiyah...give me some credit lah. We were the "Wright Brothers", thus 'High-ho"...geddit? haha..cute little sec one peeps we were. =) We were bundled off to this dark youth hostel thing on Sentosa, where every group shared a room with many many bunk beds. It was on this camp that i picked up some very useful skills, such as how to play Daidee. Of course, we played a slightly nicer version called "Asshole". it was fun, sitting on the top bunks of beds, calling each other assholes, manholes, kings, queens and the like. Oh, and bridge too, now that used up more brainpower, but it was useful, and helped me get by many boring moments in the future. somehow, i think that if you play bridge, people assume you have some kind of mental capacity. But when u play daidee, it's more "aiyeeee, u got all the 2s, no wonder u win lah". but fun fun fun all the same.
Anywez, i've kinda lost the point of this blog. Just wanted to send some love out to him, all the way across the pacific, who'll be getting on the plane to SF pretty soon. *huggies*
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Anywez, check out Singapore's First Online Ghost Stories. *evil laughter* Haha...campfire tales have gone high tech! Remember all those leetle black books with spooky eyes that we have read some time or another in our lives? It's somewhat like that, except the stories are submitted via email and posted online. farnee titles like 'terror tekong" and "bedok beware". They even have a picture section, which is erm, interesting. go see see!

making a mess of things
gosh, why am i so terribly untidy? Trying to clear up my room bit by bit everyday so that he'll have some space to put his stuff. Yet somehow, piles of stuff never seem to stop appearing on my table and floor day after day. Clothes suddenly sprout on my desk and chair, while notebooks and magazines line the floor. Perhaps i was picked up from a rubbish bin, for my parents are the neatest and most organized people i know. Messy room syndrome will terrorize me for the rest of my life! =(
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went for a dance class with housemates and hk. attempted foxtrot and samba. woohoo. okay, really, i had a great time....just that dancing seems like a rather personal and intimate thing...and so it was kinda weird to dance with some random guy. remind me to convince him to try it out. haha, it'll be something if he does.

snippets of spring
mood: comatose
Weekly dinner parties are a great idea. Ever since we started hosting them 3 weeks ago, saturday/sunday nights have been something to look forward to. We get to meet the mysterious 'missing' members of berkeleybunch, like rob. Also, our uncoordinated schedules result in our cooking our own meals on weeknights. so this reminds of how nice it is to sit down and eat a nice big meal together. yesterday the 7 of us enjoyed a spread of salmon, roast chicken, mifen and veggies (not to forget the all important contribution of rice from L). Somehow we managed a comfortable level of conversation while having our attention fixated on the "dirty dancing" taking place on tv. This movie and dinner parties always reminds me of yoek, and i thought of her, and how much she would enjoy this. But i'm sure she's having a great time in France, having her own little dinner parties. =)
Cooking is always fun, and my housemates have never failed to surprise with culinary experiments throughout the semester. Sometimes a cheesecake suddenly appears in the fridge, or i wake up to the smell of bread pudding. Very often there are yummy-looking pork dishes that i drool just looking at. lucky, lucky me. hopefully when the *ahem* 'man-slave' (as kaka and i call them) arrives, i'll be the one preparing delectable dishes for them, while he washes up. so much to look forward in just 3 days!
Past weekends have been the epitome of sloth and unproductivity and this one is no different. Spent the day glued to the telly. 12 Angry Men blows me away every single time. Although it's in black and white, although there are 12 not-so-hunky men, although 95% of the film is set in the one same room, it is nevertheless a gripping expose of the jury system. Watch/read it! who cares about homework?
Argh, my browser has crashed on me 3 times in the past 30 minutes. It's a sign. time to go.
*sigh* i can't wait till wednesday...*big grinz*