air-flown card
mood: happy (thanks 2 Ben)
don't u think humans are pretty strange?
like our unsatiable curiousity...do u ever go look at something or watch something coz you're bored or you're curious..and then when u see it u wish u hadn't. U wish that all the thoughts and pictures and words will fly back to where they came from instead of sticking into your head until time slowly makes it all fade away. Did u ever want to know something so bad and keep on asking and asking questions about it? Then when u get an unexpected answer your heart sinks, your head spins and your smile/hope/dream fades? Then u wish that nothing ever happened and everything was like it was before but deep down inside u know that it never will. and the harder u try to forget something the more it pops into your head at odd times giving u that weird sour-bitter hard-to-take feeling again? i experience that feeling alot..i guess i am rather curious...i try to draw conclusions and answers from things happening around me and i am not satisfied with not knowing the whole truth of something especially when i know a bit of it already u know? sometimes it's just better to turn away and snuggle up under your blankie and think happy thoughts. ohwell. i justsaw something that i wanted to see but when i saw it i realised that it was something i really din want to see but it was too late coz i had seen it already, and thought about it...and so the horrible suffocating gnawing feeling was already crawling up on me and i couldn't get away. so now i wish i hadn't seen it but now that i have i guess the only way to be cool about it, keep myself occupied...thinking about it a few times...and hope that it goes away soon.....until the next time i see something when i'm in one of my curious phases again and realise that it's not what i wanna see. Either that or i'll peek at something and i see what i want to see and makes me feel happy and surprised..in a good way.

something surprised me in a good way just now.
got a lovely birfday card from ben. It has lotsa cute little pple on it with little red noses like rudolph the reindeer would. I like it alot!
however, the stamp is sehr hasslich!!! Big picture of the Queen with a big weird(just spelt it wrong!) grin on her face. I think the British royal family are a really interesting bunch....=) when i was younger really wanted to meet prince william...but he's younger than me, so.....
thanks ben, i'm doing great here...but looking forward to summer and the trip!
oh yah...and ur signature makes ur name look like "zen"...hmm....a sign of the 'new' you?
Hey look! a little kao specially dedicated to you! *grinz*